Why You Shouldn’t Handle Student Behavior Alone and What to Do Instead (EP28)

Hey, everyone, and welcome to another episode of Elementary Math Chat!

Well, we all know February is known for being the season of love. But, I’m guessing one thing you may not love during this time of year is the increase in student behavior issues. It was usually during February or March that I started seeing behavior issues spike, and I think there are a couple of reasons behind this.

You’re in the midst of a long stretch without any breaks. It’s cold. You’ve had way too many indoor recesses. Everyone’s just ready for a break. So, you are not alone if you’re having more issues come up than you normally would. So, today we’re going to talk about it, and I’ll take you through the process that I used when I handled student behavior.

The first step I recommend taking is probably what you’re already doing, but just have a private conversation with that particular student and really try to figure out why the behaviors are happening. I know it may be easier to give them a behavior mark and have them sit out a few minutes of recess, but that’s not going to fix the problem.

Once you’ve identified the problem and figured out why it’s happening, then you can talk about solutions. So, let’s just say they really struggle with self-control and they are constantly interrupting you and blurting out during your lesson. Something you might want to consider is this may be a sensory issue, and they may just need some sort of small sensory toy to play with or to hold.

I’ve had the most success with the marble that’s inside of a small net. They just run it back and forth in their hand, and somehow it really does help take the place of the urge to blurt, and it’s pretty discreet, so others might not even notice they have it. You can get these on Amazon, and I will also have them linked in the show notes.

Another thing that I found to help with blurting out is chewing gum. I had one student who just had the hardest time waiting her turn to talk, and this was actually her idea. I was hesitant at first because not everyone was allowed to have gum, but we decided to try it, and it did work. After a few weeks, then we started using the gum as a reward instead of an everyday thing, and that still seemed to work pretty well. So, if you’re also having those issues, try those two things and see if they work.

Another common issue I had in my classroom was they were not getting their work done, and they were so focused on what other people were doing instead of what they should be doing. If you also have this problem, here are a couple of things to consider.

Would it help if they wore their earbuds or headphones while they worked to lessen distractions? That has worked for a couple of my students. Is there a particular student who they are extra distracted by that you can move them away from? Is there a place in your room that might help them get their work done? Ask these questions, and you never know what they will reveal that could eventually help you.

Another thing that might be the problem behind getting their work done is it might be too challenging for them, and that’s why it’s not getting done. Ask them if there’s a student they work well with that can be their peer buddy. I’ve had a lot of success with that as well, and maybe they can also work toward a small reward when they get their work finished, like extra points or a piece of candy.

So, in these conversations, do your best to get to the bottom of the issues, and then brainstorm some solutions with them that might help. Then if things don’t improve, and you find yourself having the same conversation over and over and over, it’s time to discuss some consequences of their actions moving forward if you don’t see any changes.

That could be a loss of recess time. It could be less freedom in the classroom, or maybe even a phone call home where they have to join in on the conversation and explain to their parents what they’ve been doing. Sometimes just the idea of having to call their parents will set them straight, but definitely make it clear that you would like to resolve the issues without having to make the phone call. But that all depends on their choices moving forward.

In some cases, you will see improvement from your student and you won’t have to go any further. But in other cases, you won’t. So, the next step I recommend taking is to reach out to your teammates, especially if you are departmentalized and share the same kids. Because if you’re having problems with that student, they probably are too.

They might be able to recommend a peer buddy for your student to work with. They may also have advice for how they helped the student during a challenging time, so you can approach your next challenge in a similar way.

But even if you don’t share students, I still recommend talking to your grade level because they are a part of your support system and they may have ideas that you can try, and hopefully, you’ll find something that works.

Another benefit to going to your teammate first is they can be there to support you when you talk to that student. That was something my teammates and I always did. If someone was having an issue, we were there to support them and talk to the student as well, and it does make a difference.

So, give it some time, and if things aren’t improving and you’re not seeing a change, the next step is to reach out to parents, and be proactive about this. Don’t wait until things are really bad before you make the phone call. I also think it’s a good idea to give them a heads-up, so send them a quick email, ask for a good time to set up a phone conference, and that way they don’t feel so caught off guard.

To prepare for this phone conference, I highly recommend having your students complete a behavior self-assessment. This is a chance for them to not only reflect on their behavior choices but for them to realize that they are going to be held accountable. I actually had all of my students complete this form, and then I made a copy and sent it home in their weekly notes to keep parents up to date with how they were doing. But this would be great to use for an individual student conference as well.

The one I used was simple, it only took a few minutes for them to complete, and I will have that link in the show notes for you if you want to take a look. This is also an editable document, so you can make changes to anything that I have or you can just keep it if it works for you.

You’ll see on the form there are two columns, a teacher column and a student column. I had my students go first and they ranked themselves from a one to a three on certain behaviors I had listed. One means I’m struggling with this. Two, I’m on my way. And three, I do this on a regular basis.

So, for example, one of them says I am kind and respectful to my peers. Another one says I show self-control and wait my turn to speak, and they give themselves a one, two, or three for each statement. Once they completed their portion, I went through and scored them as well.

Most of the time, my scores aligned pretty well with what they said. But there were definitely times when I gave the student a one, and they gave themselves a three, which means they were either unaware of their behavior, or they just didn’t want to admit that they were struggling.

Once both of us completed our section, then I met with each student and discussed the results. I ended up doing this during math centers, so this was my small group for the day. And you know, at first, I was just going to meet with the students who were having behavior issues. But then I decided I wanted to meet with everyone, because I wanted to tell the kids that were doing all the right things that I was so proud of them and to keep up the good work. So, I did end up meeting with everyone.

When I met with the other students who were struggling, we discussed the problem areas, and then we chose two to three behaviors to focus on. Together, we wrote a behavior goal. There’s room at the bottom for them to write this out, and to make it official, they signed their name. I made it clear that if they did not follow through on their end and improve the areas we discussed, I would follow through on my end and set up a meeting with their parents.

If and when you do meet with their parents, this behavior assessment form will help guide your conversation. You can start by discussing their strengths and what you want them to continue to do, and then you can discuss the areas that they are struggling with and read through the goal that you wrote together.

So, once you’ve gone through the areas of strength and the areas of concern, talk about some things that you’ve tried in the classroom that didn’t necessarily work, and then ask for their advice about what you could do instead. No one knows their child better than they do, and that’s why you’re reaching out to them.

Lots of times they will have suggestions either that they tried at home, or maybe they had these issues last year and they can give you some feedback about what their previous teacher did. They will appreciate you reaching out and letting them know what’s going on.

Let’s talk about the next step if working with parents does not work, and this is one you may not have considered. Before reaching out to your administrators, set up a meeting with your school counselor. They are such a valuable resource, and many times the reason a child is acting out is they are having issues either at home or something’s going on personally with them.

Maybe all they need is a daily 15-minute session with a counselor to get them in a better headspace. I have had so much success with this, so I cannot stress enough the importance of reaching out to your counselor. Their academic needs are so hard to meet if their social-emotional needs aren’t met first.

So, give it some time, and if things aren’t improving and you’re not seeing a change, it’s time to go to your administrators, and they’ll be able to help you with the next steps. That might be more severe consequences. You may need a behavior specialist to come observe. It also might be time to set up a team meeting with student support services, but they’ll be able to help you with these decisions. Chances are they’ve heard about this student before, and they’ll be able to help you with the next steps.

One of the big takeaways that I want you to have today is that I did not do this alone, and neither should you. You don’t just teach in a classroom or in a school. You teach in a community, and it is made up of people who love you and want to support you, but you have to take the first step and reach out for help if you’re struggling with student behavior.

So, to recap my recommended steps for handling student behavior:

First, start by having a private conversation with the particular student about their behavior, and reach out to your teammates to see if they have any suggestions as well. If that doesn’t work, set up a phone conference with parents and have that behavior self-assessment form with you to use as talking points.

For further support, reach out to your school counselor to see how they can support your student with their social-emotional needs. Finally, if necessary, talk to your administrators. Share what you’ve done up to this point, and they’ll be able to help you with the next steps.

Now, you might be thinking this sounds great if it’s one or two students, but what if you’re struggling with a lot of student behavior? You may feel like your class is out of control, and you’ve tried everything and you just don’t know what to do anymore. Don’t give up just yet because we’re going to talk about that next week.

But before I let you go, I have one more thing to share, and that is today’s Teaching Tip of the Week.

I’m sure as a math teacher that you have parents reach out all the time and ask how can they help their kids with math facts at home. My tip for parents was to focus on math facts in groups. Start with the 2’s, 5’s, and 10’s since those are the simplest. Then learn the 3’s and the 6’s together since you can double the 3’s to get the 6’s. Do the same with 4’s and 8’s. If you learn your 4’s, you can just double them to get 8’s.

That will leave the 7’s and 9’s, but if they know their 8’s, they should be able to use those to figure out the 7’s and the 9’s. Plus, a lot of them know the 9’s finger trick, so they don’t struggle with those as much. But those darn 7’s. They are tough, I know. So, those might be the ones they need to memorize at the end. 

This approach will at least give them a place to start, and it’ll help it feel more manageable for them. I think often they start with flashcards because that’s how we learned when we were kids, but I think it’s more effective to learn them in patterns. So, giving them that advice will really help. 

Well, friends, that is all for today’s episode. Have a great week and I will see you next Tuesday!